Gaga.

Today, I found a quote that helped me feel like I'm not alone:

"I was a bit insecure in high school. I used to get made fun of for being either too provocative or too eccentric, so I started to tone it down. I didn't fit in, and I felt like a freak" - Lady Gaga

Infatuation [Remix].

"Stupid For You" - Marie Digby

It's not everyday

That I meet a person quite like you

Perfect every way

I finally found the nerve to confess that it's you - that I want

I don't care if I act a fool

I would damn near beg for you

Put aside, all my pride

So don't keep me hanging here

Cause this girl is falling stupid for you..

Oh, oh stupid for you.. (Repeat)

The proper thing to do

Is for me to act like a lady and wait

For you to make the first move

But I don't think you're getting the point

That it's you - that I want

Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com

I don't care if I act a fool

I would damn near beg for you

Put aside, all my pride

So don't keep me hanging here

Cause this girl is falling stupid for you

Oh, oh stupid for you

Why's it always feel like I am

Chasing love when nothing's there

And here I go just making the same mistakes...

I've fallen stupid for you..

oh, oh stupid for you..

oh, oh, oh, oh

Catchup.

So I'm going to finish posts that I never got the chance to post.

Followers, this will probably annoy you, and I apologize. I just need something complete and definite in my life.

Ugh.

What's wrong with me? I don't have any friends here. Someone even told me that no one likes me because I'm a stuck-up bitch. I feel like I have to call attention to myself to get attention.I feel like my life is a lie because it seems like the people in it are.

I just feel so alone right now. I miss GSA. I miss having a shoulder to cry on. I need someone who does care; someone who will make me forget how shitty living here is.

Emily.

This is a blog about Emily. Because she requested I write one so she can come back in a year or so and read this and get all nostalgic on everyone's ass.

Say, remember that one time you pretended to be my friend? Boy, did you fool everyone. I hope one of these days, you gain a little more maturity and become a decent human being.

So here's to you, lovely. Pour a glass and let the nostalgia rumble through your veins.

Happiness.

Today has been a great day. And it all started with getting ready this morning.

I put on my foundation with my new brush this morning and it felt amazing (I'm kind of obsessed with the feeling of soft brushes on my face). I wore my puffer vest and my Uggs (favorite winter outfit). I got an A on my Sign Language final. My hoodie, tee, and memory book from Jostens came in the mail. I finished decorating my tree, and it looks gorgeous. And to top it all off, I got academically accepted into Florida State University. Y'know, after the huge ordeal I had with them involving a too-low act subscore, a resume that was sent on the wrong form, an essay that I sent last night, plus the rumors I'd heard about how hard it was to get into the school. So, out of the two schools I've sent applications to so far, I've gotten into both. I'm in pretty good shape.

I think I'm going to start using that foundation brush on a daily basis. It's apparently really good luck.

Scars.

"Scars" - Allison Iraheta

Did I say something stupid?

There goes one more mistake

Do I bore you with my problems?

Is that why you turn away?

Do you know how hard I tried

To become what you want me to be?

Take me

This is all that I've got

This is all that I'm not

All that I'll ever be

I've got flaws, I've got faults

Keep searching for your perfect heart

It doesn't matter who you are

We all have our scars

We all have our scars

You say don't act like a child

But what if it's a father I need?

It's not like you don't know what you got yourself into

Don't tell me I'm the one whos nieve

Do you know how hard I've tried

To become who you want me to be?

Take me

This is all that I've got

This is all that I'm not

All that I'll ever be

I've got flaws, I've got faults

Keep searching for your perfect heart

It doesn't matter who you are

We all have our scars

We all have our scars

Come on, just let it go

These are things you can't control

Your expectations, your explainations

Don't make sense to me

You and your alternatives

Don't send me to your therapists

Deep down, I know what you mean

And I'm not sure that's what I wanna be

No

Take me

This is all that I've got

This is all that I'm not

All that I'll ever be

I've got flaws, I've got faults

Keep searching for your perfect heart

It doesn't matter who you are

We all have our scars

We all have our scars

Oh no no no

Did I say something stupid

There goes one more mistake...

Nutcracker.

As some may know, The Nutcracker is performed all over the place this time of year. Because I'm back at Dance Etc., I'm obviously performing in this classic production. I haven't done this since seventh grade, and it's been quite an experience. Instead of just being an angel or a snowflake or whatever, I'm performing six roles - two each day.

On Tuesday, I was Clara's Mother and a Reed. Skyler was my partner. We're "entertaining." Probably because instead of just looking around and making things look awkward in the party scene like everyone else does, Skyler and I actually tried to have some fun with it. Acting is a beautiful thing. Passion for one's craft really masks one's insecurities.

On Wednesday, I was Lead Spanish and Russian. Uhm, can we just say that ever since I started dancing, I've wanted to do Russian? I'm slightly ecstatic. I love doing it SOOO much! (Even though I apparently don't breathe.)

And tomorrow, I'm Lead Angel and Dew Drop Fairy. I'm probably going to cry. I know I haven't been around for five years, but I've made some new friends and reunited with some old ones. It's a pretty special experience and I'm so glad I was able to come back and be a part of it.

I think I'm going to miss dancing. I've kind of fallen in love with it. Even if I'm not very good at it, I still love expressing myself through movement. It's amazing. <3